Goggins 2.0


I wake up to the sound of my alarm—four AM. Rise and shine. It’s the middle of winter, I have school in a few hours, and I still have an English essay to write. I throw on some sweatpants and a sweatshirt, head downstairs, throw on my tennis shoes, and walk out the door. As I get outside I see mist with every breathe I take as if I was a fifty year old chain-smoker well past his prime. It's just me and my thoughts. I do my stretches and start my run. Up to the top of the court, down the street, through the woods, to the track. As I am running I begin thinking about how I could be back in bed under the warm covers, but this just motivates me to run faster. Weakness. Instead of counting my laps I count the people I lap. The two other early risers provide a nice goal to achieve. As soon as I pass one I race to pass the next. After around forty laps, my incentives decide to leave and I am alone once again. I run five more laps and head home. Once home, I see my mom at the door, hands on hips looking as if she just saw the most disgusting combination of food such as pringles and whipped cream. Ughhh, I already know what she’s going to say. 

“Honey, get inside it’s freezing out there,” she says, hands on hips.

“Ok Mom,”  I respond while stepping through the front door.  

“What were you thinking, going out in this weather without warm clothes!”

“Idk.”

She is just hating right now. She doesn’t understand the dedication it takes to be great. She’s preying on my downfall. 

“Blake, I don’t want you doing that anymore, without warmer clothes.” 

“Ok, fine.” 

Why me? Why does she have to pick me to hate on? Does she not want to see me succeed? Does she want me to be a failure?

The next day I wake up with a fever of one-hundred one degrees. 


***


I realize now that she may of had a point about wearing warm clothes and she was just looking out for my best interest all along. In reality she was never trying to discourage me from being dedicated but was simply being a mom. Caring for her young like a mama bear caring for her cubs. My mom throughout my life has been very supportive of anything I decided to do. Sure, now and then she gives her input, but she has never discouraged me from doing something but rather guided me along the way the best she could. After all these years, I’ve come to realize that my mom truly does just love me and only wants the best for me. Whether it’s telling me to wear layers so I don’t catch a cold, or simply brushing my teeth so my teeth don’t fall out. My mom has always had my back throughout my life but I have never truly appreciated it or accepted it until now. Now I know she is only doing what’s best for me and I can trust her. 

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